Attachment

October 11, 2008

Control

We have no control over the world.

Things are ever-changing. The pace is way too fast for you to attach yourself to anything. Not a sign. Not a pole. Not a plant. Not even an entire building. Everything around me is going to change or is in the process of changing as I type these very words. This means nothing is for certain: Not objects, and not people.

Attachment

I (and maybe you as well) need to get away from the attachment game. I am very guilty of it. I get too attached to the siliest of things, like my phone, or my shoes..And though I have been in the long circle of materialistic refusal I find myself stuck on materialistic things. As an excuse I believe that sometimes the materials are more than just materials, they are also special emotionally.. Like knowing that she slept on these sheets and having it difficult to wash them. Or knowing that she chose this tissue box and therefore not being able to throw it.

Detachment

But I surprise myself.. I never knew I had the will and strength to detach myself from someone I held dear to me once. But I have. It was like throwing out of your system a piece of yourself, or one of your organs. But it happened, and I was so unaware of its process.

And..

I have lost my confidence in men. As friends, and as lovers. They have no capacity for long term. They have no capacity for attachment. You need to be ever-changing to keep a man at bay, and many women are so. But I can’t be. I am steady. I don’t change easily.
So for one, I can get attached to myself safely without worry.

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