If you’re thinking about coming out…

February 7, 2009

… Think again. Why? Let me tell you why.

There are four reactions you’d get:

  1. Understanding.
    People using this method will tell you something similar to “Oh! I didn’t know!” or “Oh! You know, I wouldn’t be able to tell if you hadn’t said” or “You know, I kind of figured that out”.
    Which is not so bad, they’re trying to remain friendly, behind these lines they are saying “you know what, I’m completely cool with it.”
  2. Flirty.
    Recently a girl who had just found out about me, stuck her body to mine and whispered “sleep with me” in my ear.
    This is not a positive experience, in fact it’s really bad. Simply because up until that point you were completely friendly.. I wonder how people like that think. Did she think that simply because she knows what I am, I’m suddenly going to change my attitude towards her?! Suddenly I’ll be interested in being more than just her friend?
    What a horrible way of perception.
  3. Negative / Awkward.
    The worst kind.
    In a very recent experience I had a girl stare at me and say “oh……….” and frowned.
    After a while she said “Oh, I hope there aren’t many other lesbians in our group…. It’s going to be really weird….”
    When I got pissed off, offended, and annoyed, she started saying something like “Ummm, don’t get me wrong, I mean it will be strange having to deal with someone from a different gender..”
    When I reminded her that there actually were men in our group.. She just looked at me in an oh-my-god-I’m-so-upset-you’re-a-lesbian way. As though somehow by being lesbian I betrayed our friendship.
    My reaction to that? A smoke.
    After the smoke? Well, I just repeat the words “kiss my ass” every time she pops in my head. 
  4. Last and not least: family’s reaction – need I say more? 

If you’re considering coming out to some people, I suggest you choose them well.
If you’re considering telling everyone… Well, keep in mind you’re in for a rough ride.

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4 Responses to “If you’re thinking about coming out…”

  1. Seattle Dude Says:

    As far as i know, coming out is an important milestone in most gay people’s lives. and well if ur in kuwait, or most arab countries i suppose, you cant just go head on with society.

  2. blah Says:

    but you are not lesbian.. you already mentioned you are bisexual and you talk about men. Stop dispapointing your male readers

  3. KTDP Says:

    ….. you forgot the following:

    1) the ./ignore (in which the person never brings up the subject again and won’t allow you to talk about it.

    2) The “finally …. a challenge” when a guy will try to swoon you and never actually get it no matter how brutally honest you are with him.

    …. and yes I have been guilty of my number 2 with a friend back in college ….. it was an education for the both of us. She now lives happily with her partner someplace far, far away ….. the women was a good cook as well ….. goddamn it I miss here lasagna. (we’re still good friends and laugh about it now)

    I’m babbling … apologies ….


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